one two three fourrrrnication!
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
