last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
Dude I need help. What word is complimentary, but sounds like "chunky"?
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
I just realized I haven't looked at our horoscopes lately. If mine says anything about tweakers, I'm burning my phone.
Oh shit oh shit oh shit.
BURN THE PHONE.
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
