margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
I just realized that I have dated 5 unemployed guys...and 3 that drove pt cruisers...Turns out I do have a type.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
