this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
I'm offering you baseball tickets and my vagina, isn't that enough?
I can wear a rubber suit at three am and spank someone's ass until its sore and fuck them three ways from Sunday. And get up the next day and do their laundry. As long as once in awhile they rub my back without expecting anything
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
Randomize
