Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
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