i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
I have an odd instinct I wont find my underwear tonight
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
It’s 830 am and the amount of Valentine’s Day snaps I’ve already seen makes me either want to vom, drink a bottle of wine, or buy chocolate
1000% No lie I was just looking on insta and was thinking about taking a bottle of wine to the face..
Yea and there’s destruction when we’re together, mostly of our livers but W/e
Randomize
