Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
Randomize
