"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Why is there an appointment in my calandar called "get the fuck to the bus" at 3 am june 19th?
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
I will fuck anyone who brings me mcdonalds right now
Randomize