It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Mike found the condom wrapper on the washing machine and looked at me and said "Magnum? NICE girl. Get that nut!" then proceeded to puke in a cup
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
You're telling me he never had to ask for a blow job and he STILL broke up with you? I call bullshit on that one.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
drunk me cartwheeled over a turtle sandbox & slit my foot open on a cinder block. how do you explain that to a doctor?
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
Randomize