My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
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