Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Randomize
