fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I always wonder when I meet a guy from online if he needs a moment to mentally register and accept the size of my ass. maybe ill wear a dress.
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Randomize