I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Convinced the domino's pizza delivery person to go to shaws and buy me a bottle of wild turkey. For america.
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Sally, Your mom and my mom hooked up in college, we must uphold this tradition.
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
