so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
