We all know the best way to start a relationship is greeting while at least one of you are intoxicated, dual facebook stalking, and a two week long game of 20 questions via texts to 'really' get to know each other. In that order.
I wouldn't have it any other way. It's like a fairy tale!
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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