Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Pants are for mortals
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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