I haven't been this sober since birth.
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I have to estimate how long it takes them to get to the bedroom so that I can sneak out of my room and get snacks. If she's anything like me, they're in bed the second he gets here and I can get snacks now
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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