mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
just threw up in a gas staton parking lot in front of a father and son. stared them in the eyes and finished like a boss
Randomize
