I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
You are a finance major, can I use my 529 account for your bail?
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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