You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
No subtext here. People are naked.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
I'd say it's his fault for never running us through proper protocol for "catching your RA in the middle of him banging some girl"
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
im bringing home some absinth and some holy water. one way or another things are going to get spiritual.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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