Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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