Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I'm gonna do things to you that will make the neighbors want to move.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I got high with the cantor. Rethinking this whole non-practicing Jew thing.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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