come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
