apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
Randomize
