I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Every shot buddy I have I end up blowing. I don't know whether this pattern is good or bad.
Sorry I missed your call. Have a great morning.
That is a horrible way of saying good morning to someone. You basically reminded me that we did not hook up yesterday. It's bad enough I got to go to work all day with blue balls.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
Randomize