So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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