i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
So I think I've successful blown my foot off in a way that's going to make you call me an idiot.
Randomize
