As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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