4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
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What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I don't deserve a penis
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
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