Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
it was either a really good one night stand or a really really good first date. thank you online dating
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
He still texted me and invited me over a day later so I guess I'm the lovable kind of psycho
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
Randomize
