there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
possible new low: just washed a permanent marker penis off my cheek with porta-potty hand sanitizer.
also if this is gonna be a sample of how country jam will be, I might as well break up with him now. he spent the night blacked out and I could have been in a three-some.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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