and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
Randomize
