oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
YOU LET ME GO HOME WITH CREEPY RON JEREMY?!?
...and?
I hate when you're right.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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