So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
Randomize
