No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
I was just walking down the hall and passed a very pregnant girl wearing a shirt that said "blame it on the aaaaaa-alcohol." I can't decide if she's brilliantly witty or just pointing fingers.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
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