People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I drank 13 shots. Which is unlucky. Which is why i threw up.
you threw up because you drank 13 SHOTS
I took the precaution of putting my macbook the one place in the dorm there is no way i can piss on it... the toilet
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Congrats. You are not detrimental enough to my psyche to be discussed during this mornings therapy appointment. Please follow up next week to see if you made the cut.
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
His penis is the only thing worth pursuing but all the baggage attached isn't.
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