So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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