last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
What did you want me to do? You know I don't like fat people. I'm an asshole to them sober it only gets worse when I'm drunk
That doesn't make it okay! You tried kicking the girl's mom out where we were having the party at!
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
New rule: if someone asks if you would like to snort a xanax the answer is no.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Randomize
