it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Randomize