worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
It was awk he was sittin on a plastic backyard chair in his underwear and high white socks in the dark watching the nuggets game
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
She came home, put on the news, left a 20 minute drunk message on her friends machine, then proceeded to play back the entire message laughing hysterically and then just passed out
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize
