What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
You left wolverine marks
I'm somewhere between sorry and proud
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
Randomize