no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
The claw marks on my back are healing nicely. Just thought you should know.
My bad. Next time I'll wear mittens.
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
HE MIGHT HAVE YOUR BUTTHOLE, BUT HE CANT HAVE YOUR HEART. THATS MINE.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
