Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
Pants are for mortals
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Randomize
