i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
Randomize
