it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
