im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Just reached for my phone in my non existant pocket while it was in my hand.
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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