She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
Four minutes until I can fart!
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I bet. I bought a surfboard and a kite and filled my camelback with vodka-tonics. Let's do this
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
