Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
The last thing I remember from that party was me shouting "hold my feet I'm going in strapped like Rambo"
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
