Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
