When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
