Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
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