let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
thought i was the most hungover person in class until i saw a kid puke into his bookbag...he wins
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
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